Client funnies

There's been a drought in my funny business from clients. Maybe the word is out that I am keeping a log of their "questions"?

Here are a few from the last week:

• A very concerned client called tonight. She spent several thousand dollars having surgery to repair her dog's detached retinas last year. One of her dogs was in heat, and she was scared of this dog getting "too excited", so could she just keep Vick's Salve on his chin to distract him?
• Another owner, very NEUROTIC about her cats, told me that every time she picked her cat up, it meowed. Does that mean it has cancer?

I have also come across some funny things written in charts. I just laugh out loud when I come across them:

• A dog described as having "pork chop physique"
• A dog described as having a "tragic expression" (a true description of a hypothyroid dog)
• An old cat: "3 feet in the grave"
• "Betty resurrected" (kitten found with frostbite from cold)